friendlove is the practice of friendship
kin.
kind.
known.
it’s one thing to know someone loves you. it’s another thing to feel it. friendlove gives you the language for the conversations that build the friendships you actually want.
your kindred profile
sample
the witness
full season · oracle expression
“you help people find their own answer, and you’re honest in a way most people never risk.”
a type. a season. the care that actually lands.
why friendlove
we have friends. we don’t always feel them.
most people aren’t lonely because they lack connections. the care is there. it just isn’t landing in a language the other person can receive.
so we go quiet, say “i’m fine,” and keep the real thing for the group chat instead of the person it’s about. friendlove gives you the words for it.
“relationships are just a series of conversations.”
research participant
kindred
gives you the language for friendships
four things your profile tells you.
your result is your kindred type, the kind of friend you are to the people who get you, and your friend language, how you give and receive love in friendship.
7 types
who you are
how you most naturally show up as a friend.
4 seasons
where you are
not who you are. what you have to give right now.
8 friend languages
what lands
how you give care, and how you need to receive it.
5 contexts
where you’re building
the shape of your friendships and the gap you actually feel.
seven ways to show up
you get one primary kindred type and the way you express it. no one is all seven.
the witness
the oracle
the bridge
the anchor
the life speaker
the spark
the catalyst
four seasons
where you are right now. it moves, and naming it keeps people from reading a season as distance.
full
emergence
pivot
restoration
the spill
every strength has a spill.
you’ll see yours in your result, along with what the people who love you can do about it.
your result
a result built to be sent.
your kindred profile ends with three cards written from your own answers. screenshot one, send it to someone, and the hard conversation has a way in.
who i am
i’m the friend who helps you hear yourself. i’ll ask the question, and i’ll tell you the truth. i’ve got real capacity right now, even as i’m becoming someone new.
kin. kind. known. · friendlove
how to care for me
push me toward who i said i want to be. send the small unprompted check-in. and when i go quiet behind a wall, name it and stay. don’t take it personally.
kin. kind. known. · friendlove
what i’m working on
asking for what i need instead of waiting for people to figure it out. that wait hasn’t worked. i’m learning to say it plainly, so come find me.
kin. kind. known. · friendlove
sample cards from a sample profile. yours are written from your own answers.
how it works
take it. sit with it. send it.
step 1
take kindred
28 questions, about 8 to 10 minutes. answer how you actually show up, not how you wish you did.
step 2
sit with your profile
does it feel accurate? what would you add or adjust? your profile is where the conversation starts, not where it ends.
step 3
send it to one kindred
pick the friend who deserves to be seen this way too. send them the assessment, not your guess at their type. let them tell you who they are.
the gallery
welcome to the gallery.
where stories get told, confessions are made and we really get into it.
confess something: one sentence. no name. the friendship thing you’ve never said out loud. you don’t need to take kindred first.
a prompt
the “i love you” that sounds like something else. (ex: “text me when you make it home.”)
the gallery · friendlove
a hot take
a friendship hot take. say it with your chest.
the gallery · friendlove
a moment
the moment you knew she was really your people.
the gallery · friendlove
a shot
how you shoot your shot with a potential friend. (ex: “we should actually get food sometime.”)
the gallery · friendlove
the research
not a personality quiz.
kindred comes from interviews with real people about what it feels like to be known, and it’s grounded in what friendship researchers have found.
jeffrey hall
closeness takes intentional time. roughly 50 hours to become a casual friend, 200 or more to become a close one.
research participant
“like having a program. we’ve built our own language. you know what to do without being told.”
quality over quantity
the quality of your closest friendship predicts well-being. how many friends you have doesn’t.
these findings describe patterns across people. your profile is how they show up in you.
before you go
which conversation have you been avoiding in a friendship that matters?
take kindred, then send it to one person. start there.